


Purple Petals

by HowlsAttackOnPhandoms



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Character Death, Childhood Friends, Hanahaki Disease, Mentioned Kim Hongjoong/Yeong Yunho, Not Beta Read, Sad Ending, Sweet november ending, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:06:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27114436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HowlsAttackOnPhandoms/pseuds/HowlsAttackOnPhandoms
Summary: Unrequited love is a horrible thing. It causes pain, agony, and sometimes flowers. Seonghwa knows this, has learned it through the years, but the purple hyacinth emerging from between his lips is the final indicator. He loves Hongjoong. But he knows Hongjoong doesn't love him.or"Seonghwa had heard of Hanahaki syndrome before, a mysterious illness that infected those with unrequited love.He knew it would get him. He was surprised he’d made it this long."
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa, Park Seonghwa/Song Mingi
Comments: 1
Kudos: 49





	1. The First Petal

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! I hope you enjoy this little story of mine. It just popped into my head so I had to get it down on paper. It's been a while since I've written anything so it feels nice to be able to put the jumbled mess in my head down into words. It did end up sadder than I anticipated but sometimes there's beauty in sorrow. 
> 
> But without further ado, please enjoy!

“I’m getting married.” 

It felt like a punch to the stomach, Seonghwa’s heart getting wrenched out of his chest. 

He smiled, hoping that he could cover the pain. Hongjoong didn’t seem to notice. 

“I can’t believe he finally got the balls to ask. Took him goddamn long enough, don’t you think?”

Seonghwa gave a non-committal hum, begging himself to keep it together. He was happy for Hongjoong, he really was. 

But it didn’t make it hurt any less. 

The tickling at the back of his throat was indicative of what was to come. 

————————

Seonghwa had heard of Hanahaki syndrome before, a mysterious illness that infected those with unrequited love. 

He knew it would get him. He was surprised he’d made it this long. 

As Hongjoong talked about wedding details, the clawing at the back of his throat become more insistent. He shoves it down, afraid of anyone finding out. 

They can’t know. It would become a burden on Hongjoong. 

While Hongjoong loved Yunho, Seonghwa knew the other would abandon everything for him. 

And he didn’t want that. Hongjoong deserved to be happy. Even if it wasn’t with him. 

So he hid it. Laughed through the pain. 

That night he coughed up his first flower. 

It was a beautiful flower, a light purple hyacinth. 

Sorrow. That was its meaning. 

Seonghwa stared at it sadly, watching as the flower rested gently in his hands, unburdened by its originators worries. 

With one last look he gently released the flower out the window, letting the wind take it away. 

—————————

It gets worse. 

It becomes harder to hide. 

Seonghwa has to excuse himself more, rushing to the bathroom before a slurry of bloody pedals leaves his mouth, leaving a rosy pink in the toilet bowl. 

Still he does not cry. 

He knows he’s dying. 

His love for Hongjoong would kill him. 

He wouldn’t have it any other way. 

—————————

Mingi starts to notice his strange behavior. Seonghwa plays it off. 

Smiles through the pain, the incessant scratching at the back of his throat, a constant reminder of what’s to come. 

He doesn’t care that he’s dying. 

He just wants Hongjoong to be happy. 

On the eve of the wedding, Mingi finds him, sat on the tiled floor, sobbing over a pile of bloody petals. 

It was the first time he cried. 

Mingi held him through it, his fingers pressing bruises into Seonghwa’s arms with his strength, attempting to fix the unfixable. 

Time passes. Seonghwa calms down. 

Then came the soft whisper. 

“It’s Hongjoong isn’t it?”

Seonghwa remains quiet, his silence the only answer Mingi needs. 

“I’m so sorry.”

Yeah, Seonghwa was too. 

Time moves on. The flowers keep coming.   
——————————

The wedding was beautiful. Hongjoong looked radiant. 

Love was palpable in the air. 

Seonghwa cries at the wedding. Silent tears. Happy tears. 

He couldn’t help himself. He wished it was him instead. 

But Hongjoong smiles at him and it was as if the pain vanished. 

Everything felt right with the world. 

Until Mingi took Seonghwa’s weak hands in his, squeezing lightly, reminding the other of reality. 

Hongjoong was married. Hongjoong wasn’t his. 

Gentle fingers wipe the tears off Seonghwa’s face. 

“I’m so sorry.” 

Seonghwa laughs, removing Mingi’s hands from his face. 

Giving a sad smile: “It’s okay.”   
—————————

Hongjoong sought out Seonghwa during the reception, arms wrapping tightly around the elder. 

“It means the world to me that you were here.” 

Seonghwa swallows around the flower in his throat, giving Hongjoong a smile. 

“I think I have something I need to say to you.” 

Taking the younger’s hand, Seonghwa makes the most selfish decision of his life.   
—————————

“I’m leaving.” 

The words taste bitter on his tongue but he forces them out. 

Has to. 

Hongjoong looks shocked. 

“…Why?”

Seonghwa gives him a sad smile. 

“Because I love you.” 

Silence falls around them. Hongjoong doesn’t utter a word. 

Seonghwa laughs softly. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

Hongjoong looks hurt. 

Pain blossoms in Seonghwa’s chest. 

“Because I know you don’t love me.” 

“That’s not true. I would do anything-“ 

Seonghwa cut him off. 

“That’s why I couldn’t tell you.” 

He took Hongjoong’s small hand in his, his thumb rubbing over the shiny wedding band. 

“It was never going to be me.” 

The hand in his tightened, Hongjoong’s determination shining through. 

“We could have tried. I could have learned to love you.” 

Tears fell down Seonghwa’s face. 

“Do you really believe that?” 

Hongjoong faltered. 

Seonghwa sighed. 

Reluctantly, he removed his hand from Hongjoong’s, the remaining sunlight glinting off the gold band. 

“Do me one last favor.” 

Hongjoong nodded slowly, hesitantly. 

“Close your eyes.” 

Long eyelashes fawned over high cheekbones as Hongjoong did as instructed. 

Seonghwa held his breath. 

Carefully, ever so carefully, he leaned in, placing his lips on Hongjoong’s. 

It wasn’t anything extraordinary, but to Seonghwa, it felt like everything. 

All his longing, his pain, his love flowed out of him. Hongjoong just accepted it. 

He was so selfish. 

Pulling away, he leaned his forehead against Hongjoong’s. 

“Keep your eyes closed,” he whispered. 

Hongjoong nodded. 

“Count down from 10.” 

A singular tear rolled down Hongjoong’s cheek. Seonghwa gently wiped it off. 

“10…” 

Seonghwa leaned his forehead against Hongjoong’s. 

“9…”

A gentle press of lips to the forehead. 

“8…” 

A lingering hand. 

“7…” 

Whispered “I love you.” 

“6…”

Silence. 

“5…” 

Sounds from the party blending back in. 

“4…” 

Yunho’s laugh. 

“3…” 

Clinking glasses. 

“2…” 

‘Now a toast.’

“1…” 

Nothing.


	2. Purple Conclusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Seonghwa fades, Mingi watches, attempting to help in anyway he can. His heart is fading, but so is Mingi's.

Mingi watched him get worse. 

Every day new flowers would come up. 

Everyday Seonghwa would smile at them fondly. 

Every night Mingi would try to sleep, listening to Seonghwa’s muffled cries. 

It hurt. 

Because he knew Seonghwa’s pain. 

He loved Seonghwa. 

But Seonghwa only loved Hongjoong.   
————————

“Do you think it’ll be a painful death?”

Mingi looked up from his cooking, eyeing Seonghwa as the other looked out the window. 

Birds cawed from some tree. 

Silence followed. 

Mingi gripped the knife tighter. 

“No.” 

Seonghwa chuckled. 

“It’s the best they can gift us poor souls with.” 

Mingi raised an eyebrow. 

“A painless release.”   
———————

Time passed. 

Seonghwa got worse. 

Mingi watched as he could no longer stand on his own, watched as Seonghwa couldn’t leave the bed anymore, relying solely on Mingi for support. 

He watched it all. And it hurt. 

He wanted to scream at Hongjoong for allowing Seonghwa to get this sick. 

But he knew it wasn’t the other’s fault. 

He wanted to sob. 

But it wasn’t his place. 

It didn’t stop the flowers from coming. 

The first time he held his own purple hyacinth in his hands, he laughed. 

HIs own pain seemed so trivial compared to Seonghwa’s. 

But he knew it wasn’t. 

Seonghwa loved Hongjoong. But Mingi loved him.   
————————

“Have you ever been in love Mingi?”

The question startled him. He watched Seonghwa as the elder contemplated his move on the chess board. 

“Yes.” 

Seonghwa picked up a piece, the shaking of his hands making it hard to place it in the correct spot. Mingi helped him. 

“Was he kind to you?”

Wryly, Mingi grimaced. 

“He is the kindest person I will ever come to know.” 

Seonghwa gave him a kind smile. 

“That’s good. I hope he makes you happy.” 

Mingi gave him a sad smile. 

“I don’t care if he makes me happy. I just want to ease some of his burden.”

Seonghwa laughed. 

“He’s one lucky man.” 

If only he knew.   
————————

It happened during a warm day in the spring. 

Mingi woke up. Seonghwa didn’t. 

The funeral was quick. Mingi was the only one there. 

Seonghwa wanted it that way. 

Tears fell down onto the purple hyacinths planted next to the gravestone. 

“Why did it have to be you?”

Mingi wrapped his arms around him, hoping that the action would keep him together. 

It didn’t. 

So he poured his heart out to a gravestone. 

Guilt was all he felt. 

For Seonghwa’s death freed him from certain death. 

But he couldn’t help Seonghwa.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed, though it was a little sad. Remember to stay safe and healthy!


End file.
